Father and Son

To all of you reading this for the first time, although it sounds as if I may be referring to my father thankfully he is still around although admittedly with his share of health problems. I did lose my mother to cancer at age 60 back in 2002 so I have experienced the trauma of losing a parent early in life.  I am trying to conceptualize the lifelong relationship between a father and a son. That could be me with my father as he gets up there in age, my son and I, or anyone of us. As I was writing this I guess I was thinking more in terms of my son’s relationship with me and the events he will experience and possibly have to deal with as he grows older.  Whether this makes you smile or cry, I imagine most of you will relate at some level.  Thanks for reading.

Da da
Daddy read to me?
Daddy I love you!
Daddy wanna play catch?
Hey Dad, thanks for coaching my team.
Dad I’m so mad that we lost!
Dad are you coming to my game tonight?
Dad can you drive me to the movies?
Dad I have a girlfriend.
Dad can I talk to you about birth control?
Dad how did you know when you were first in love?
Dad when I’m at away at college I promise to call once a week.
Dad I got an A in my chemistry class.
Dad I met a girl that I really like.
Dad I’ve been accepted into the junior year abroad program!
Dad I’m nervous about graduating and finding a job.
Dad thanks for helping me pay for college.
Dad let’s go grab a few beers somewhere.
Dad I got a really great job offer.
Dad I’m getting married!
Dad they want to promote me but it means moving away.
Dad we finally closed on that house we love.
Dad were going to have a baby.
Dad its a boy!
Dad how’d you and Mom survive these toddler years?
Dad how about you and mom coming for Christmas this year, the boys would love to see you, its been awhile.
Dad do you think you and Mom can make it to the graduation in June?
Dad congratulations on your retirement, you deserve it.
Dad are you keeping busy?
Dad I miss you, maybe we can come visit this summer.
Dad, Mom said you haven’t been feeling too well.
Dad we’ll be on a plane tomorrow to come see you.
Dad you’ve lost a lot of weight.
Dad you look so old to me.
Dad thank you for everything you’ve done to make my life so special.
Dad you’ve lived a great life and accomplished so much.
Dad I’ll be sure that Mom’s okay.
Dad its okay to let go.
Dad I love you.
Dad everyone in attendance today is here to honor your life. You were a blessing to so many people, a wonderful husband to Mom, a caring father to your children and a friend to so many.
Dad we will miss you.


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13 responses to “Father and Son

  1. Such a moving and beautiful post!

  2. Thanks for the clarification in the edited version, Steve! I was worried that maybe your father had passed…

    Beautiful post, and a reminder of how quickly life goes by. My dad will be 74 in a couple of months but is getting frailer all the time (Parkinson’s Disease). It seems like just yesterday that he was playing catch in our field with my little brother and I…


    • Thanks Wendy. Not sure why I wrote this, guess I’ve been thinking about my father getting up there in age, he’s just a year or so younger than yours. But also was thinking in terms of my relationship with my son and things that he may someday be saying to me over the years.

  3. What an incredibly moving post. Well done!

  4. I wrote a comment yesterday, and i see that it is gone. Clearly it was not the right commnt though, as i was sending you my apologies. Gives us all something to think about.

  5. I know what you mean…it’s scary…my dad will be 72 this year. You think how old your getting yourself & then foget about your parents…they get older everytime you do!

  6. I lost my dad (and mother) five years ago. This made me cry. Glad you decided to repost it!!

  7. Thanks for the clarification. I didn’t comment when I “liked” simply because I wasn’t sure whether there had been a passing or not.

    I lost both my parents at 15, so I never really got past the “Dad I got an A in Chemistry”. But I certainly feel the post.

  8. Sheesh, Steve. Thanks for making me cry.

    But seriously, this was beautiful. I really love that you wrote this, because it truly encapsulates the essence of love and time in such a concise manner.

    I lost my grandpa at 60 in 2002 to kidney disease (2002 was a bad year for both of us apparently). He’d been sick my whole life, but since my own father wasn’t in the picture, he filled that role for me. Again, your piece is so beautiful! Because even though my papaw was at dialysis three times a week, your work still conveys his place in my heart.

    I’m giving you a standing ovation, you just can’t see it. 🙂

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