Those of you who read this post know that we recently experienced a major ice storm in our area.
Here’s my Facebook Post today…
It’s day four of Ice Storm 2011. As of this morning, Thursday, February 24, power was still out. Folks at the power company seem confident it will be restored today… that’s a good thing! In light of all of this, to try and find some humor in the whole situation, here’s the top 10 things I learned during this power outage. Sorry for a few choice words… it’s been a tough week!
10. A woodstove is a fabulous convenience in a house. It has saved our asses numerous times over the years, and especially during this outage. You can heat at least one room to a toasty 75-80 degrees. You can boil water on it. You could probably even cook a four course meal on it. Maybe I’ll try that one of these days when I don’t have anything more pressing to do.
9. When people ask if you have power yet and you say no, they say shit like… “oh my god, you don’t have power yet? It’s been a long time.” Hey, seriously… I can see that you’re concerned and all, but don’t make it sound like it’s my fucking fault that I don’t have power yet! If I could climb up the poles and rewire the whole fucking system… believe me… I would have done it by now. And yeah, it’s been a long time, no shit Sherlock! I’ve been living in one room of my house with the rest of my family for three days now and pissing in un-flushable toilets. No one has been murdered yet so as of right now it’s all good.
8. Both inventions have their benefits, but I’ve decided that indoor plumbing is a more important invention than electricity. I can make light and heat with candles and fire. On the other hand, with all due respect to Tom Edison… yeah, I know the whole kite and key thing, great story and all… but disposing of a shit in your house without plumbing is pretty difficult. Not that I tried or anything like that…
7. If I had to go back and live 100 years ago, and I could take either my TV or my laptop and internet… I’d take the laptop and internet. I could easily live without the TV, I don’t really like TV, and a few days of NOT having it constantly blaring with iCarly and all the other crap my kids watch makes me realize I really don’t like TV. I couldn’t live without my computer.
6. It’s easy to live without electricity if you don’t have to look good in the morning. If I was a homesteader and I just had to get up in the morning to start the daily chores… it wouldn’t matter what I looked or smelled like… I could be frickin’ Amish. The goats don’t give a shit if I am having a bad hair day. Cows, if I had any wouldn’t give a shit either. But when you have to get dressed and go to work and you just tried to take some semblance of a bath in the bathroom sink in the dark… well you can only do so much with hair gel.
5. Butt wipes are an important tool in the world of power outages. If the original American Colonists had access to butt wipes, they may not have been so pissed off, and we’d probably be under British rule today.
4. The folks at the power company deserve a big hug. Not only the guys that have been working 24 hours a day outside in the cold repairing power lines… but especially the people that have to answer the phone all day and listen to us douchebags tell them that our power is out. Yeah dude, everybody’s fucking power is out, we just had the worst ice storm in two decades. They need to get the hospitals, fire stations and police stations on-line before they can get you back on-line. Sorry you’re going to miss Glee this week.
3. Wine, and plenty of it, makes the whole damn situation seem just a little bit better.
2. Four people sleeping in one small room with a snoring St. Bernard, and a crackling fire can be uncomfortable and difficult. But in a weird way it has brought the family together for a few days without the distractions of TV’s and Wii’s and everything else. When your only focus when you get home is getting the fire re-started, figuring out how and what to eat for dinner and being comfortable for the night, you forget about all the other shit going on in your world… and for a few days that’s a good thing.
1. Maybe, just maybe it’s time to invest in a generator.
The Brown Road Chronicles 
Our worst ice storm to date was in 1998…luckily, our power was only out for seven hours (it seemed like much longer). There were people who were without power for weeks…we were lucky!
I feel your pain about stupid kids’ TV…my kids watch the drivel on Family Channel!
Here’s hoping you have flushing toilets and working appliances soon!
Wendy
Here’s hoping… haven’t been home yet to find out.
Sell the goats and buy a generator!
Ohhh… but I love my goats!!
Wait a minute. There’s something missing here. What is it? Oh, yes, humor. Is someone cranky? Well, a dirty butt will do that to you.
A generator couldn’t hurt, especially if you already had one, but do you know how high gas is going to get? Maybe you need a stove in the bathroom to heat water.
Last summer I made a pretty good solar cooker; this summer I’ll attempt a water purifier. Course that doesn’t solve your problem. Check out my friend, Jon Vagg’s post on making electricity. Find him in my blog roll and his post starts with something about his birthday not too far down. I’d give you a link but I don’t know how to do that in a comment. I really want to know if that one would work.
What, me cranky? Yeah, definitely cranky! 🙂 I’ll check that site out, sounds interesting. My son always wants us to put solar panels on one of our barns. Besides the cost, I keep telling him, for six months of the year, there isn’t enough sun around to make it worthwhile… I don’t know if that’s really true or not but there isn’t much direct sunlight in the winter. Yes, you are right, the cost of gas is high and getting higher, the cost of oil is brutal too.
BTW… not cranky anymore though, wife is home and power is back on! 🙂 Next post I be back to my regular ‘ol funny self!
http://jonvagg.wordpress.com/2011/02/01/birthday-mud-and-thoughts-about-electricity/
I figured it out. If you try it, let me know how it works.
Oh, yeah. I gotta tell you this: Once I had a house right next to an old folks nursing home. When the power goes down the power company will bust their collective asses to get the power back on ASAP. No one wants headlines: Old Folks Freeze to Death while Electric Company takes Coffee Break! They do have priorities, you know.
Yeah priorities. I have a friend who’s wife works for a nursing home and he said they pretty much all have big generators now that they can fire up if power goes out. Probably a regulation these days. But yes, that would not be a good headline!
The cranky made me laugh. I liked each of those points. #5 cracked me up. I’m teaching my fourth graders about the Revolutionary War right now. I should mention about the butt wipes..lol..
Sorry about that. I now see what you were comparing my holiday too.
What does the plumbing have to do with the electricity? Was a little confused at that point. Also, what is a butt wipe?
Your poor dog must have wandered what had actually happened?
xx
When you’re house water is served by a well, rather than being hooked to city water than when the electricity is off the we’ll pump doesn’t run, thus no water.
Butt wipes are baby wipes like you use when changing diapers. Thankfully we are way past that stage but always good to have some wipes around!!!
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I love no. 2
Wouldn’t know anything about ice storms (I’m in Houston), but when it took two weeks after Hurricane Ike for the power to come back on, I vowed never to take power for granted again. The house was wet, it was hot, muggy, and I could smell the mold growing. It was like camping, only wetter. Without power, there were no cell towers, our pump would not pull water from the auqifer, no computer or Internet — but our land line continued to work! Of course, who else has one of THOSE anymore?
People would wait in line at the gas stations for hours for two things: gas (fr generators) and ice (for beer?).
Butt wipes. My fav. Most would be surprised at their multi-uses. But your #3? An extended outage with four small kids required it. Nice post! I came over from Peg’s, by the way.
Ugh can’t imagine dealing with hurricane damage. I guess no matter where we live there’s something. Yes #3 is important! Thanks for stopping by! 🙂