Sorry I had to jump on the bandwagon. With the recent hyper-activity of SPAM followers going around WordPress and with no noticeable solution on the horizon, I figured I would take the situation into my own hands. So, here’s a post that hopefully will deter some of the Spammer’s out there from clicking my subscribe button.
Ten Reasons You Shouldn’t SPAM Follow Me:
10. I don’t have Irritable Bowel Syndrome. I will admit to having suffered with hemorrhoids occasionally but definitely not Irritable Bowel Syndrome. Sometimes the morning after drinking too much I feel like I might have it, but that usually goes away in a few hours.
9. I don’t need any more credit cards. I have enough of those and I typically pay them off every month. I appreciate your concern with my financial well-being but so far I am in good shape with only moderate amounts of debt. I’m sort of old-fashioned too. You would have had better luck if you had sent me an envelope with one of those cool, fake credit cards in it. That would have piqued my interest a little more than you following a blog about goats and such.
8. I don’t speak any languages that fall in the categories of Asian or Arabic or even European. I especially don’t speak Indonesian-ese. See, I don’t really know what language they even speak in Indonesia, but seems I have become a popular blog in that region. In fact, I’ll admit that I really don’t even know where Indonesia is and if it’s a country or just a region, or perhaps just an area. I only speak English and even that I struggle with sometimes.
7. I’m not a believer in God or really anything religious. If you were subscribing to my blog so that I might join your legion of brainwashed followers, well sorry, you’re definitely wasting your time. Why I haven’t been struck down by lightning yet, in the 45 years I’ve been around is a popular question.
6. I don’t buy much clothing and I’ve never, ever bought myself a women’s purse or women’s jewelry. That’s not really my thing. In my younger days, I did used to be a little bit metro-sexual, but the whole country life has kind of kicked that in the ass. In fact I haven’t even purchased new underwear in several years. I’m not really the best candidate for your retail operations.
5. In a similar vein, other than my wedding band, I don’t wear any Men’s jewelry either, especially a watch. I understand that there are a lot of really cool, imitation watches out there, that would perhaps make me look like I am very important and wealthy. But I just find that I don’t really need a watch anymore. See, I have my phone and it tells me the time all day long. In fact I think it pulls the time from somewhere up in outer space, where I guess there’s some kind of super clock that is always right. I don’t really know how it works but it’s very smart and it even knows when to change to daylight savings time, which is pretty cool. So, that’s working out pretty well for me.
4. I’m not much of a dieter. Especially healthy diets. If your diet plan consists of pasta, hot dogs, wine and other food that comes from a box, including the wine, then perhaps I might be more interested.
3. I’m not in a position right now to be buying any new appliances. I will share with you that our dishwasher broke down about five years ago and we’ve never replaced it. We just do our dishes the old-fashioned way, in the sink with a brush and a sponge. Our Microwave just recently started acting up, not turning on and other strange behaviors. But we discovered that if you hit the side of it pretty hard, that seems to usually get it back on track. I think I’ll just keep doing that for a while.
2. This blog is not that popular. I know I like to toot my own horn and pretend that it’s very popular, but I still haven’t even reached the 500 subscriber mark. Now, I will admit that number is increasing exponentially with the recent influx of followers, but of those that are actually subscribed I think there are probably only about 30 that are reading actively. There’s probably other blogs that might be more lucrative for you. Perhaps you could find a good blog written by an Indonesian Credit Card Salesman who suffers from Irritable Bowel Syndrome.
1. Frankly its CREEPING ME THE FUCK OUT! This is a personal blog, GO THE FUCK AWAY!