No More Twinkies

This is a sad and tragic milestone in our history.

I’m sure you have all heard about the imminent demise of the baked goods company Hostess, maker of the most iconic and delicious treat ever to grace this very earth… the Twinkie. I’m sure you are all also having sleepless nights, lying awake, plagued with concern that my goats will no longer be able to get a Twinkie every time you leave a comment on my blog.

Now as much as I’d like to jump on the bandwagon and blame yet another ridiculously outdated, greedy, asinine and out of touch Labor Union for destroying one more company on the ever shrinking list of U.S. manufacturers…

… I won’t … because frankly I feel I may be partially to blame here.

You see, I have not been writing much and thus, you my fabulous fans and readers have not been leaving comments on my blog and thus, my goats have not been getting nearly the volume of Twinkies that they used to get when I was writing four to five posts a week.  Now granted, my goats are likely much healthier but I think that this decrease in the volume of Twinkies they are consuming may be the root cause of why the Hostess company had to file for bankruptcy in the first place.

I don’t know…  it’s just a theory but I’m feeling a little guilty about it.

Now apparently the Hostess company is going to sell off the rights to some of the brand names that they manufacture, so perhaps Twinkies will resurface in some other incarnation of snack food. But it won’t be the same, it’s a Hostess Twinkie and that’s all it will ever be.

Tragic…

In any case, apparently this will be the last post of mine in which my goats will receive a Twinkie for every comment you leave.

So make it good…

Because they are not going to take this news lightly.

And if you have any thoughts about what I can give my goats now, every time you leave a comment, I’d welcome the suggestions.

 

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34 Comments

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34 responses to “No More Twinkies

  1. Youngmomof3

    Boy scout popcorn

    • You know, I never knew until this all started that Twinkies had this reputation as being a survival food that would last forever. I’ve don’t have a lot of experience with Little Debbie products, they were always like the “off-brand” little sister to Hostess. This will probably be good for them.

  2. I have been told that if one eats enough twinkies, because all the added perservitive, the body never decays. So here is one for the immortality of your goats. I live just outside of Seattle, and this story is quite the news.

  3. How sad, America has lost its twinkie, its the end of the world, twinkie bar lovers should buy the factory and keep it going.

    Give the goats a milky way.

  4. I’m more of a Ho-Ho girl, so of course I’m devastated. And this isn’t just about Twinkies. It’s about Wonder Bread and all the other Wonder products. I’m sorry for your goats. Really, I am. But if this turns out to be your fault, well Cowboy, you’d better get to writing. Apparently, the future of America’s baked goods is in your hands.

  5. I was going to give you a recommendation of my favorite chocolate baked good…..but keeping that secret with me in case you put that company out of business too! So instead, I will give you my least favorite…..Suzie Q’s.

  6. Devil Dogs. And a big quart of milk to wash it down.

    • Those devil dogs are the driest damn food ever invented. I think those super absorbent rags like the Sham-wow, that they sell on Infomercials are made from the same thing as devil dogs! They could choke someone to death without the quart of milk!

  7. I am not sure why the demise of the Twinkie is a bad thing, other than the loss of jobs and people’s lives. I had a Twinkie once on a trip to Montana. It tasted artificial which is likely why it was so popular. I do feel bad for your goats, although I am sure they will find something else equally unpalatable. I hope this finds your goats well.

  8. Ah, small world. My husband was one of those who lost his job yesterday. Now we’ll see if all my Armageddon planning and unemployment checks will keep us alive.
    My apologies to your goats, who–for those who don’t know–were eating rejected Twinkies. Now to your problem, I suggest you switch to pigs. They’ll eat anything.
    And you’re correct about the union: A Christmas Oink- oink to the pigs. The whole thing isn’t going to affect the VIPs in the union very much; even if all the bakeries fail, they still have the tobacco industry, which I don’t think is right. Can anyone say: conflict of interest.
    Tonight I’m going to brew up a cauldron and put a hex on ‘um. Whahahah!

    • Sorry to hear your husband was one of those laid off. I think unions were important back in the day, but now are an outdated model that drastically needs to be changed. But that’s for the experts to figure out. And I don’t know much about pigs, but goats will eat almost anything too. Good luck with the hex!

  9. I think you should start giving them chocolate chip cookies instead. I have some good recipes :) and the cookie monster totally needs the competition.

  10. I’d read somewhere that a lot of farmers are now buying feed mixed with candy due to the rising price of corn feed. Also, it seems to result in fatter animals. Can’t remember where the article was, but who doesn’t love hyperactive, sugared-up animals? Maybe you could switch to Little Debbies Snackcakes?

  11. Cheryl

    I couldn’t believe, when I read it, that Hostess and the famous Twinkie was doomed. I’m sorry for all the people who have lost jobs as a result. And I find it scary that I immediately thought of your goats! LOL! I’m thinking you should try the goats with some May Wests! Throw a little chocolate into the mix.

  12. As the person above me commented, I’m very sorry for the workers who’re losing their jobs! Very, very sorry.

    Now, what I think about the ‘demise’ of Twinkies: can’t give a shite. In the same way that I didn’t grow up watching TV or listening to pop music, I didn’t grow up eating Hostess products. I was an adult before trying a bite of Twinkie and found it disgusting. I’ve tried bites of other things and the only thing I liked (albeit, it’s rather disgusting and waxy, too) was the Lil Debbie ‘brownie.’ (not like any brownie I’ve baked)

    Anyway, it’s like saying OMG there’s the company in Lithuania that makes the number # knick knack in all of the Balkans and they’re CLOSING! Uh. Sorry to hear that. Guess it’s a real drag?

    In other words: it’s another thing I just don’t get. I’ve had them, they tastes like crap — and being a girl from the Ozarks, I’ve eaten crap. That’s what you get for not properly washing stuff you picked in the garden! :)

    • As I mentioned above I think its more the iconic nature of the “brands”, Hostess and Twinkies and all the others, then the actual flavor of the products. But I know, I grew up on the stuff. But of course I very rarely eat any Hostess products anymore and my kids don’t either. It’s the nature of the business probably that people are eating less of that kind of “junk” and/or there’s more competition out there that probably led to the downfall.

      • I’m sure you’re right about the ‘iconic’ thing. I’m just saying it’s not to me. I don’t get it. I also don’t get ET or whatever pop culture affected people of my generation cos I didn’t experience it. It’s a cultural mystery.

  13. Smear some Cool-Whip in those spongecake dessert cups. Naughty and Heath will never know the difference.

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